we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Randomize
