If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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