standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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