Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
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