"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
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