So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
don't judge my taste in strippers
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
