We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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