And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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