Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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