Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
