Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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