I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
