All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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