I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
