I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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