I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
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