So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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