how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
These tits shall not be calmed
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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