maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
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My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
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I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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