I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
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What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
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Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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