I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
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I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
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