Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Randomize