dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Proof That Kendall Jenner Is The Queen of Cannes
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.