Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
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