he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
