Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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