PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
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