ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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