in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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