Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
