Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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