think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize