Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize