Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(843): View more from South Carolina

I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.

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(210): View more from Texas

Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.

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(609): View more from New Jersey

so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?

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(973): View more from New Jersey

do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(360): View more from Washington

Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...

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(423): View more from Tennessee

All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.

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(615): View more from Tennessee

...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker

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(850): View more from Florida

Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.

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