Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis

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(313): I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis http://tfl.nu/f8bv

Replies (3) Good night (798) Bad night (1068)
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(847): View more from Illinois

So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.

(541): View more from Oregon

Together?

(847): View more from Illinois

Preferably.

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(847): So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch. (541): Together? (847): Preferably. http://tfl.nu/lik5

Replies (21) Good night (3400) Bad night (624)
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(253): View more from Washington

I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.

(281): View more from Texas

No. Just liquor. Time's no good.

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(253): I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time. (281): No. Just liquor. Time's no good. http://tfl.nu/1yv7

Replies (14) Good night (2976) Bad night (937)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.

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(412): You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night. http://tfl.nu/f2ed

Replies (14) Good night (7396) Bad night (765)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.

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(860): I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die. http://tfl.nu/bqq9

Replies (9) Good night (1103) Bad night (3153)
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(206): View more from Washington

he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.

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(206): he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him. http://tfl.nu/ufis

Replies (22) Good night (714) Bad night (4364)
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(618): View more from Illinois

It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.

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(618): It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days. http://tfl.nu/kqbj

Replies (9) Good night (1522) Bad night (3289)
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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.

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(403): Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train. http://tfl.nu/xn8k

Replies (16) Good night (1111) Bad night (3129)
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(817): View more from Texas

Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.

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(817): Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass. http://tfl.nu/wbhi

Replies (18) Good night (3634) Bad night (928)
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(770): View more from Georgia

good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.

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(770): good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed. http://tfl.nu/g7ri

Replies (4) Good night (2773) Bad night (814)
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(618): View more from Illinois

Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.

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(618): Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum. http://tfl.nu/gdla

Replies (8) Good night (1601) Bad night (558)
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(206): View more from Washington

I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.

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(206): I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month. http://tfl.nu/ayye

Replies (19) Good night (1682) Bad night (1285)
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless

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(570): U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless http://tfl.nu/wr07

Replies (0) Good night (724) Bad night (340)
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(940): View more from Texas

I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.

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(940): I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack. http://tfl.nu/gvul

Replies (5) Good night (254) Bad night (573)
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us

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(608): Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us http://tfl.nu/mqe2

Replies (1) Good night (363) Bad night (206)

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