Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Randomize