oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
