I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Randomize
