Texts From Last Night

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  (214): View more from Texas

  I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts

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  (214): I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts http://tfl.nu/860y
  Replies (20) Good night (3105) Bad night (661)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...

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  (248): Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed... http://tfl.nu/xlpz
  Replies (120) Good night (1630) Bad night (5324)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!

  (1-314): View more from Missouri

  What?

  (314): View more from Missouri

  I have a yeast infection.

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  (314): I'm bakin' bread in my pussy! (1-314): What? (314): I have a yeast infection. http://tfl.nu/o2ns
  Replies (180) Good night (2341) Bad night (28911)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking

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  (917): You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking http://tfl.nu/a0v5
  Replies (11) Good night (3716) Bad night (1170)
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  (386): View more from Florida

  Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.

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  (386): Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go. http://tfl.nu/vo4f
  Replies (11) Good night (865) Bad night (3298)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?

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  (214): Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us? http://tfl.nu/e7z7
  Replies (13) Good night (5300) Bad night (1541)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday

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  (715): Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday http://tfl.nu/15ro
  Replies (6) Good night (2856) Bad night (1087)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!

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  (617): Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood! http://tfl.nu/rv6i
  Replies (3) Good night (2105) Bad night (951)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?

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  (914): Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea? http://tfl.nu/04z0
  Replies (8) Good night (1435) Bad night (745)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!

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  (+44): He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again! http://tfl.nu/ztd6
  Replies (9) Good night (861) Bad night (1410)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?

  (416): View more from Toronto

  I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way

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  (416): Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again? (416): I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way http://tfl.nu/h01t
  Replies (4) Good night (776) Bad night (1152)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha

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  (203): I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha http://tfl.nu/gfdl
  Replies (5) Good night (728) Bad night (491)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.

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  (917): New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward. http://tfl.nu/1xcw
  Replies (3) Good night (899) Bad night (502)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking

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  (801): The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking http://tfl.nu/vhrx
  Replies (1) Good night (289) Bad night (518)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.

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  (248): this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here. http://tfl.nu/h7oj
  Replies (3) Good night (438) Bad night (251)

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