If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize