My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
FUCK WHALES
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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