Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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