32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
