so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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