youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
