well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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