Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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