with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
