Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching her eat just hurts me
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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