Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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