but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Randomize
