Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize