I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
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